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The Secret Parade

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Sunday, June 03, 2012

All those times of laughing at Gen's bouts with food poisoning has finally come to bite me in the ass - quite literally.

I have diarrhoea. (Hehehe brown colour to gross you out)

Food poisoning, to be exact.

*Disclaimer: Expect grossness. Leave page if eating nutella.

This is all very new to me. You know how people are particularly susceptible to certain kinds of sicknesses? Mine has always been fever. When I was 15 years old, I used to get a fever every month. I never found out why, but I suspect that my immune system was really smart - always breaking down during school days when there were three periods of Chemistry.

I'm trying to narrow down the cause of my food poisoning down by analyzing What It Could Have Been:

1) The lau hong sheet of seaweed
2) The peanut butter cupcakes...
3) Or the fact that I ate 8 of them

This morning I woke up feeling a little strange, but I assumed it was merely due to a lack of sleep. Then the few of us met at Starbucks. Daryl offered me a caramel waffle, and I declined.

What I was thinking in my head: Did I just turn down food?
Linus' verbalization of my innermost thoughts: "Did Izzy just turn down food?"

See, I might have garnered some kind of reputation over the years D:

So began my epic journey home on the train. Home was 10 stops away, and the train has never moved slower. Somewhere around the 5th stop, I started feeling nauseous. I contemplated asking a fellow passenger for an unused plastic bag. Three stops away, beads of sweat were starting to form on my forehead, and I practically Usain-Bolted out once the train doors opened.

This is where my dignity kinda gets stripped.

I run into the toilet cubicle and kneel on the floor before the toilet bowl, rueing the day I decided that peanut butter was one of my major food groups. Nothing happens. If this is what the first trimester is like, then I don't ever want to get pregnant (sorry, Prime Minister). After ten minutes, I ask the nice people at the Control Station for a plastic bag, and I carry a big Giant plastic bag all the way home, alighting at two other stops to go to the toilet.

Home has never seemed so far away.

Now I'm still feeling nauseous, but at least I'm nauseous at home. I'm sipping on some salt water (my cheapo way of replenishing electrolytes), I haven't eaten since breakfast, and I'm waiting for my Mum to come back with charcoal pills (so Asian - eating barbecue-starters HAHA).

Here's to a better day tomorrow, a bonding experience with Cindy (she has food poisoning too), and a battered husband should he insist on having children in the future.